My Funny “Ugly Christmas Sweaters”

I just added a new post on my blogger blog, showing off some of the funny, silly Christmas designs I have on Zazzle. Check them out on sweatshirts here if you’re looking for a cheesy “Ugly Christmas Sweater” for the holiday season!

They’re available on all kinds of things in the HaHaHaholidays store, too.

Thanks for stopping by!

-harymess

check out Zazzle’s Black Friday week promo codes

Fun Gifts for Writers and Readers

GIFT IDEAS FOR THE WRITER AND READER ON YOUR LIST

If you have a writer or reader on your Christmas or birthday list, I compiled this list of gift ideas from my Zazzle stores. Hopefully, this list will help you find the right present for your writer or reader relative. Some of these items are funny, some are unique novelty items and some are practical. All are inspired by my own love of scribbling and getting lost in a good book. I also love a good deal, and you probably do, too, so if you find the gift you’re looking for, stop by Zazzle’s coupon page before you buy.

funny fiction writer shirt

The ultimate funny shirt for writers: I’m a Fiction Writer – Yes, I’m poor; No, I don’t wish I wrote ___; Yes, I’m aware that no one reads anymore; No, I’m not drunk.

leggings for a writer

Leggings for the woman who writes. The word “WRITER” is printed in white typewriter-style letters on both legs.

antique typewriter writer necklace

A classic gift idea: a necklace with a black, antique typewriter and the word “writer”

Writing Editor T-Shirt

An editing /revision design. “Don’t you forget to carefully edit your writing.” Edited, the sentence reads, “Don’t forget to edit.”

writing time writer clock with typewriter

A writer clock for your office. Instead of numbers, the clock says “writing time” in a circle. It has a worn paper look with a black typewriter. You can even customize the words on the typewriter paper.

Fiction Writer / Novelist Novelty Story Dartboard

What writer wouldn’t love this dartboard? Take a shot, make a plot. This tongue-in-cheek game board offers story prompts and character motivation ideas for when you’re stuck with writer’s block. Throw a dart and you have your story all worked out!

Funny rejection letter basketball hoop for writers

Hang this novelty basketball hoop over the trashcan and it becomes the perfect receptacle for rejection letters. “Insert rejection letters here.”

Pretty Emily Dickinson Surreal Book Poster for Readers or Libraries

This unique, pretty poster shows a ship made out of a book, complete with book birds, a paper dragonfly and balloon and some sea creatures. The Emily Dickinson quote says, “There is no Frigate like a Book / To take us Lands away.”

Funny "Let's Eat" Grammar Shirt for Writers and Grammar Snobs

Correct everyone’s grammar with this funny and slightly macabre t-shirt. “Let’s eat, Timmy” is correct at the dinner table. “Let’s eat Timmy” is correct on a raft in the ocean.

Colorful Bookshelf Pattern Kindle Case, Personalized

This pretty, brightly-colored bookshelf pattern will spruce up your Kindle case. On the front, you can even add your name to personalize it.

Skull and Cross Quills "Writer" Tote Bag

This writer bag design shows a skull with the word “writer” drawn into it. Instead of crossbones, it has crossed quill pens.

Violently Not Silently Correcting Your Grammar / Funny Writer Button

I’m silently correcting your grammar? No. Be less passive-aggressive with this farcical button: I’m violently correcting your grammar. One stick figure shoots the other with an arrow.

Funny Button for Mystery or Horror Writers: Plotting to Kill You

I’m Plotting to Kill You (in my novel) This grungy, vintage-looking button is perfect for mystery or horror writers.

Writer / Author Marketing Tool: Book Cover Business Cards

If you’d rather get your writer friend a practical gift, look no further than these book-promotion business cards. Of course, you’ll need their book cover image and their short blurb. If you know all the details, nothing is more useful for a book writer than a stack of business cards to help spread the word. All text and background colors are customizable.

Funny Chocolate Writer Rejection Cure Chocolate Bar, Personalized

If the query letters are piling up and you want to send a gift to cheer up a rejected writer, this 2 lb bar of chocolate should help. It says in fancy type: Chocolate: the Confection that Cures Rejection. Add a personal note, too.

Infinite Monkey Theorem Funny Writer Mug

If your friend or relative writes constantly and has a sense of humor, this mug might be the perfect present. A little understanding of Infinite Monkey Theorem might help, too.

Each design is available on lots of products. If you’d rather browse everything, you can find them in these 3 stores:

1. LaborAndLeisure: writer business products and lots of writing and grammar humor

2. BookParadise: a brand-new shop dedicated to reading that has two designs at the moment

3. HaHaHolidays: you’ll find the funny fiction writer t-shirt design HERE, on many more products

I hope you find the right gift for the writer or reader on your list!

-harymess

All designs © MK Hess

My New Irish Pub Home Bar Design on Zazzle

NEW IRISH PUB DESIGN WITH YOUR NAME ON IT

Hello! I haven’t updated my blog for a while. I’ve been busy experimenting with designs. I spent most of January making random patterns, and then I spent February starting a new line of promotional items for authors and adding a few new Valentine’s Day designs. I thought it was a good time of year to try new things, since the holiday rush is over. Last fall, I made a line of saloon-themed products, and they’ve proven popular – especially the cork coasters. So, I decided to make a whole series. That way, you can outfit your home bar with whatever theme you’d like. I’ll probably be adding new themes here and there throughout the rest of the year. In honor of Saint Patrick’s Day, I just finished this Irish Pub theme:

Personalized Irish Pub Home Bar Products on Zazzle

I started with the coaster (the image in the lower left) and then created matching items. Going clockwise from the coaster, this image shows a stein / mug, a clock, a hat, a wall poster, playing cards, a pillow and a t-shirt. There are plenty more matching items available in the FancyCelebration store here.

If you want to add a personal touch with an Irish theme, or if you know someone with a home bar or man cave, this design is very easy to personalize – just fill in the fields provided on each product page. And, as usual, don’t forget to check Zazzle’s coupon promo page to get a better discount.

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!

-MK

All images copyright MK Hess

My Zombie T-Shirt is on Zazzle’s Main Page Today

I’m pretty excited about this because I’ve never had a design listed in “Today’s Picks” on the front page. My “I Kill Zombies Old-School” t-shirt is there today (the brown t-shirt on the right): Zazzle Main Page.

Here’s the shirt in my store, too.

-harymess

Funny Thanksgiving Turkeys

Funny Thanksgiving Turkeys on Zazzle

THANKSGIVING
     So far, I only have a couple Thanksgiving designs in my HaHaHolidays Zazzle shop, but I thought I’d go ahead and show them here because I probably won’t get more made this year. Christmas sneaks up too fast afterward, so I’m working on that — plus I’ve been experimenting with patterns and trying to learn new techniques with the free software, GIMP (which is very cool; I’m going to post links to some of my favorite tutorials soon, in case you’ve never tried the program and would like to do that).
     Anyway, here is a picture of the Thanksgiving designs. The angry turkey one is pretty straightforward, but the other t-shirt & the card are a little hard to read in this graphic. They both show a mutant creature that is part turkey and part Valentine’s Day heart, wearing a Santa hat and holding up a bottle of champagne. The creature is drunk and is saying, “Happy Thanksgivi-Christma-Valentine’s Day on Whatever Year This Is!”
Thanks for stopping by!
-harymess
All images copyright MK Hess

Zombie & Halloween Designs

Funny Zombies & Halloween on Zazzle
     Here are some of my zombie / Halloween – type designs on Zazzle. Halloween is coming up so fast! I’m busy working on Christmas and trying to navigate some website-building sites like Weebly (here’s one I made for my favorite funny holiday designs) and Wix (here’s one I just set up for a mixture of business cards). But so far, I’m not that skilled at promotion. I just figured out what an RSS feed is, and I’m still not sure if I know how to use it. I like to experiment and see what can be done, promotion-wise, though.
     Using the free versions of those two sites, Weebly was much simpler to use, and I think I like it best. The Wix templates look cool, and I really can’t complain about a free site, but it’s harder to find / work with the html feature on there. Plus, everything is very touchy when you’re moving it around. But I liked the final result. Both were fun to build, but I’m not sure of how much help they’ll be or whether it’s worth the time to make more — when I could be spending that time designing and writing.
     It was fun putting this picture together, too. I especially like the fact that both men are the same guy — it has a creepy clone thing going on. I’ll have to make more of these collections, instead of just posting individual shirts here.
     Well, thanks for stopping by.
-harymess
All images copyright MK Hess

Funny T-Shirt Design for Writers

A DESIGN FOR WRITERS

Writing is my greatest passion; I even manage to get some humor published now and then. Because I love to write so much, I thought it would be easy to make writer designs for my Zazzle stores. But I ran into a problem: I don’t want to think about it when I’m designing t-shirts. You see, I make shirts when I’m taking a break from writing. That’s why I’ve only made a handful of designs for writers / authors. One of them has grown fairly popular, though — at least on Facebook and Tumblr — so I thought it was worth listing here. The rest are in the Writers section of my HaHaHolidays store or the Writers section of one of my newest (unorganized) stores.

1. Here’s the most popular version of it. I made this on a whim last fall, after scribbling it in my spiral “idea” notebook. It’s inspired by real life, of course. These are the answers to commonly-asked questions all writers hear when someone finds out you’re a writer.

Funny Tee Shirt Gift for Writers / Authors

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet T-Shirt on Zazzle by HaHaHolidays

2. It started selling, and then I heard from a few writers who said the last line wasn’t always true. So, I recently made some alternatives. I like the plain-text design above, but the drawback is that plain-text designs are too easy to copy, so I fancied these up a little. I made a couple notebook designs, and crossed out the word “not” in the last line — for writers who are drunk. Here you go:

Funny Writer Tee Shirt Gift on Zazzle

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet Drunk T-Shirt by HaHaHolidays on Zazzle

And here’s a different version, with a more subtle notebook paper:

 

Funny Writers Tee Shirts Gifts on Zazzle

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet Paper Drunk T-Shirt by HaHaHolidays on Zazzle

It’s available on some other items, too. I like the yellow notebook one on a square button or magnet:

Funny Writers Pins Gifts on Zazzle

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet Drunk Buttons by HaHaHolidays on Zazzle

It looks pretty good on a mug, too. I think the drunk one works best there — because you’re in the process of drinking:

 

Funny Writers Gift Drunk Drinking Mug on Zazzle

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet Drunk Mug by HaHaHolidays on Zazzle

And here’s a bag for writers who still aren’t drunk (also available for those who are!):

Funny Writers Gift Bag on Zazzle

Funny Fiction Writer Answer Sheet Paper Bag by HaHaHolidays on Zazzle

I made it available on a lot of different products in four categories here. But if you’d like it on a product I haven’t included, send me a message. The message link is now at the very bottom of the HaHaHolidays store.

Next up:  more holiday designs.

And if you like young-adult horror-humor escapist fiction, I’ve made Run for Your Life! .99 through Halloween.

Thanks for stopping by!

-harymess

All images copyright MK Hess